A Reflection for the Friday of the Fourteenth Week in Ordinary Time
“Take with you words,
and return to the LORD;
Say to him, ‘Forgive all iniquity,
and receive what is good’…” (Hos 14:2).
I have always hated public speaking. Whether it’s speaking to a packed room of students or adding my voice to the Prayers of the Faithful at a tiny chapel Mass, I often find the words won’t come and fear how they will be received.
But often even more difficult than public pronouncements is speaking to people you love and have let down.
So what grabbed my attention in today’s readings are the instructions we are given about how to speak to God and to one another. In the first reading from the prophet Hosea, the Lord addresses the people of Israel, who have broken their covenant and returned to worshiping idols. “Take with you words, and return to the LORD,” he says. They are told to ask the Lord for two things: forgiveness for their infidelity and also that he accept the good they have to offer, even if it pales in comparison to their betrayal.
It can be easy to forget that second part when we are feeling guilt-ridden or ashamed of our actions toward another. It can leave us paralyzed even when we know the words we must say—I’m sorry—because we fear we are not worthy of forgiveness.
Every word of repentance, whether before God or to our brothers and sisters, helps to build God’s kingdom. He has given us the words to say. We just have to get over our fear of speaking them.
You’ve probably heard the phrase, “Everything you need to learn you learn in kindergarten.” Well, almost everything I needed to learn about Christian forgiveness I learned in middle school. It was in those years that I jeopardized my relationship with the girl who had been my best friend since I was 1½ years old because I wanted to make it with the popular kids.
This might sound like a relatively minor infraction from an adult’s perspective—really, who was their best self in seventh grade? But popularity can be as dangerous an idol as any golden calf (and try to remember just how awful it felt to be excluded at that age). When I realized the hurt I had caused my friend, I was deeply ashamed of myself and was not sure I deserved her friendship after all. I agonized over a letter to her, struggling to find the words to express my sorrow. I finally apologized for how I had treated her and recounted the countless memories we made together over the years. And, miraculously, she forgave me, remembering what was good about our friendship, which lasts to this day.
I still struggle to find the right words to say on many occasions both public and private. But that experience of being forgiven laid the foundation for understanding God’s mercy. “Do not worry about how you are to speak or what you are to say,” Jesus tells the 12 apostles as he sends them to preach the kingdom of God. “You will be given at that moment what you are to say. For it will not be you who speak but the Spirit of your Father speaking through you.”
Every word of repentance, whether before God or to our brothers and sisters, helps to build God’s kingdom. He has given us the words to say. We just have to get over our fear of speaking them.
