Young Rose had three options Wednesday afternoon—an ace, a deuce and a joker. She drew the joker, which meant that she had to tell me a joke. I could see her 11-year-old mind churning. Finally, she asked: “What do you call a camel with three humps?” Her eyes glowed in anticipation as I pondered the punchline.
The day before, on Tuesday, July 16, another Jesuit vocation promoter and I had our arms full of Jesuit-y things—beautiful tablecloths and floor displays, boxes of prayer cards, stickers, magnets and books, and even a few prized T-shirts and coffee mugs. We entered the cavernous and, at that time, still quiet exhibition hall of the Indiana Convention Center to set up our booth at the 10th National Eucharistic Congress.
Having been there just a few months prior for the National Catholic Youth Conference, I knew what awaited. Tens of thousands of faithful Catholics would flood into the space the next day, and I would be on my feet for hours. And hours. And hours.
In the stillness of what would surely become chaos, I felt a twinge of discomfort—perhaps “imposter syndrome,” a sense that somehow, I didn’t belong. The week before, an article had come out in The New York Times describing today’s newer priests as “young, conservative, and confident.” That article doesn’t exactly describe me as a recently ordained priest of today. I’m more middle-aged than young (42), I have studied, appreciate and integrate a wide variety of theological traditions in my work, and I have struggled with confidence my whole life. And in my work cultivating vocations for the Society of Jesus, I often find myself navigating Catholic people’s questions, doubts and even hatred of the Jesuits. I felt suddenly tired, and knowing what lay ahead, I offered a prayer for strength.
“Pregnant!” Rose said, with her brother, sister and father looking on. That’s what you call a camel with three humps—pregnant. We laughed, her brother told me about how he wants to design video games, and her father told me about how his wife, an artist who also has an exhibit in the hall, tries to glorify God through the beauty she creates.
I spoke with a Kansas City Chiefs fan who has “mad respect” for Jordan Love and my beloved Packers. I ran into some current seminarians who were once discerning with the Jesuits, and we greeted each other as brothers. I offered blessings for students who attend Jesuit high schools, and I prayed with students and Focus missionaries from Newman Centers I have been lucky to visit. I celebrated with people who love the Jesuits and were transformed in their faith by them, and I also talked with people who had heard all about “those Jesuits,” and I assured them of our love and commitment to working for the church.
I ran into countless priests and brothers and sisters who I have met traveling the Midwest, people who had been moved by homilies I had given, and bishops who had given homilies that fundamentally changed my understanding of Jesus. I heard confessions. I adored Jesus with 50,000 other Catholic people from every corner of the country and expression of the faith. Discomfort disappeared as quickly as it had come, and I found a community of belonging and belief. We all have a place here at the Congress.
Rose has come back to visit us every day with a new joke. “What kind of money do astronauts use?” I didn’t know.
“Starbucks!” Thanks for the tip, Rose. I think a late-afternoon coffee is just what I need to carry on in this beautiful encounter.
America is at the 10th annual National Eucharistic Congress in Indianapolis. Find additional essays and reflections here.
